Saturday, August 31, 2019 / by Charlotte Rose
How to NOT sell your House!
Disclaimer: All examples used in this are fictional.
Any resemblance to you is coincidental. The purpose of this is to inform not insult!
1) Leave the lawn, after all its the house they are buying. No need to pick up all those little presents Fido has been leaving you all over the yard either.
2) Paint your walls in bright, vivid colors and patterns. After all everyone loves a red and purple room with green dots!
3) Leave out your dirty movies and magazines. No one will see them, its the house they are looking at.
4) What odors? My house doesn't stink. So what if I smoke cigars and Fido has an accident every now and then.
5) Leave dirty dishes in the sink and counter tops. I was in a hurry!
6) No need to fix that hole in the wall where your little ones threw that ball. After all they only broke the ceiling fan and left a 4 inch hole. Anyone with kids will understand.
7) No need to fix that leak under the kitchen sink. As long as I dump that bucket every two or three days, no harm done.
8) Leave those dirty, wet towels and clothes on the floors. The alarm clock didn't go off this morning and I' not expecting to show the house today.
9) Fido is such a sweet dog, he wouldn't hurt anyone. Let's leave him out of his crate today.
10) No need to clean that green slippery slime off the steps. It's only slippery when its wet and I haven't fell yet.
If any of these remarks resemble you, sorry! I hope you like your house